Friday, May 28, 2010

I swear... SWEAR...

... if I ever see a person dog-earring a library book I am going to... well, I am going to glare at them and imagine, angrily, punching them in the face repeatedly.

And the guy who stuck BOOGERS to the pages of the copy Christopher Moore's "The Fool" that I borrowed via inter-library loan from some Library in Saginaw... Dante never saw a realm of Hades deep enough for you.

OH, and who ever let their kid take crayons to the brand new copy of Diana Gabaldon's "Echo in the Bone"... seriously? I should have to try and read through your child's Crayola? Do you not think that if your precious offspring renders pages of a book unreadable you are obligated to let the library know and perhaps, just perhaps, replace the book? Instead i get to go in and explain how this book was already like this when i got it. Thank heavens everyone in the library knows me by name and I am in there twice a week so they know I'm trustworthy, otherwise *I* might have had the pleasure of paying to replace the book YOU screwed up.

If you want to dog-ear your books, dog ear YOUR books. Or even, maybe, just dog ear the tiny corner, don't fold over the whole freakin' bleedin' page so that when I open the book the page disintegrates along the *bleeping* FOLD LINE!! Or better yet, use a scrap of freakin' paper as a book mark. I mean, really, is that so hard?

And honestly, Mr. or Ms. Booger-Sticker... would you really paste together the pages of your OWN book with mucus nuggets? if not then why the heck would you do it to a book that doesn't belong to you and that other people are going to try and read, you sick disgusting *lapses into silence trying to think of non-swear words to finish this thought* *says them out loud instead and wishes she weren't trying to keep her blog low on profanity*.

I never ceased to be amazed by the lack of respect people show for things that do not belong to them. I am, in equal parts, disappointed, disgusted and infuriated.

Edit to add: the dog-earred book that inspired this: Under the Dome by Stephen King. I get to spend 1073 pages trying to keep this half page from falling out and getting lost until I can return it to the library and let them know it fell apart in my hands when I tried to read page 127. I wonder what things King could think up to punish people who abuse library books...

4 comments:

  1. OMG, I confess. I am a "dog-earer." But only a tiny little corner, I swear, and boogers? Just gross.

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  2. you could have scotchtaped the page.... but EWWWWWW on the "mucus nuggets"... even if your phrasing DID have me ROFLMFAO! I have family visiting this week, and the 7-year old wiped his nose on his forearm.... and then wiped his forearm on the arm of my sofa.... needless to say I was NOT impressed in a good way.....

    ~PlacidAir

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  3. denise, if the dog ear is just a corner i grumble to myself and get over it because it doesn't effect my reading of the book (but I do ask people who borrow my books to please use the bookmarks I provide and not dog ear, lol) and i don't expect everyone to be as obsessive about books as I am, heh. But when it is half the page... and it damages the printing... *head explodes* I'll save the mental face-fist for the folks who are doing more than just a teeny corner, I promise. lol.


    I called the library and they don't want the page scotch-taped, they have special archival acid free tape stuff they use.

    And ewww. I once caught the child of someone who shall remain nameless sticking boogers on the wall behind my couch. And the parents thought it was funny. *sigh*

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